Apologies for the delay folks, but it appears it took me a while to recover from that last Pina Colada at my farewell party…was a goodin.
So where to start. Have no idea how I ended up out here. Came out of my box one morning to discover that I had been sent to a marine research station on Lizard Island in the northern regions of the Great Barrier Reef…..random!! Anyway, saw this as a good opportunity to work on my tan and expand that beer belly of mine. My minder seemed like an amiable kind of lad as well, despite the fact that he stood at over 2 metres tall and sported the kind of dodgy mexican moustache that only a person who has spent too much time in a remote location could get away with.
Turned out to be quite a lovely spot I’ve got to say. The locals were kind enough to take me on my very first scuba dive. Unfortunately, while I was enjoying the sights of the Great Barrier Reef, a particularly horny octopus took a like to my red hat and tried to drag me away. Thankfully my minder got to me just in time….we had words over that incident! Was also lucky enough to get out for a bit of a fish with the boys. We weren’t hving too much luck, so I thought I’d have a bit of a shot and show them how its done. Aparently the local fauna found me somewhat irresistible and I somehow ended up within the jaws of a large mackeral (am a little suspicious of my imnder about this one).
Christmas and New Years was full of fun and frivolities. I’m glad to say that I was lucky enough to meet another likeminded gnome individual on Christmas Day…her name was Bertha. We shared a very pleasant day together and a rather rambunxious night as well if you don’t mind me saying (wink wink). Unfortunately, she wasn’t the commitment type, and the next day she was off chasing the new guy on the block….some young upstart with a blue hat…the nerve of him!! So, I decided to drown my sorrows on New Years Eve. We ended up at some form of Super Hero gathering and I was finally able to revel my alternate identity as “The Dark Gnome”!!!!!!!!
Unfortunately, after 2 glorious months, my feet got itchy again and I started dreaming of new destinations unseen. What lay beyond the horizon? So, with that in mind I bid you adue. Until next time….
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